Why it is important to let go of your past and heal yourself

"This is coming from a very personal space that I have only recently gathered the courage to open up about. Like depression, I felt a certain stigma attached to heartbreak, and I almost felt embarrassed and awkward talking about it publicly. But then, whenever I think about what I went through , I feel the urge to talk about it more without any hesitation because I think of all the people struggling to cope up with heartbreak that I can help by sharing my thoughts and my struggles.  For starters, all I want to say is I GET EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH."

-Niki

 

I think the only reason I am able to talk about it now is because I have healed to a lot of extent and because I am learning to let go of my past. And I will tell you in right about a second from now why that is extremely important.

2016 was an emotional roller coaster for me because I went through a very rough, toxic phase in my personal life that I am sure not a lot of you would know about. It was sad, extremely sad because I was in love and I wasn't loved back. I am the type of girl who has a very old school take on love. I believe in fairy tales and I believe in love, loyalty and everything that comes with it. For me to not get any of that from my relationship tore me apart completely. So when I say I GET WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH , I DO. 

I let it affect my work,  I started having anxiety issues that I still have from time to time , my mood still dips suddenly whenever I think about why all of this had to happen to me or why the person I loved with all my heart turned out to be such a human. I'll tell you why. It is because whoever comes into our lives, has a lesson to teach us. A bad relationship taught me how to value love more, it taught me to be more grateful to my parents who understood me, stood by me, acted as my best friends, my actual best friends.. I became grateful for them because I realised I had such incredible friends who wanted to see me happy, that's all they really wanted. Well that and to punch that guy in the face. That relationship taught me how to love myself which I had forgotten to because I was too busy loving someone else. It made me realise how strong I was. 

Times when I write articles like these, it's more of a healing session for me as well because I am pouring my heart out, my vulnerable side in front of all of you who love me. And so, I want to tell you today, Why it's important to let go of your past and heal yourself.

If you had a fall out with your best friend and you feel the other person is no longer fighting to make it alright, let it go.

If you had a fall out with your partner, and he/she did not make any efforts to get you back , let it go.

Let it go because people who didn't fight for you, don't deserve you. The fact that you are feeling pain means your heart is of gold. It has so much love to give. Why would you want to waste it on someone who doesn't know what that love is worth? 

My best friend once told me in 2016 and he said,  " You know who is at loss here? He is. Not you. And no, I am not saying that because you have a successful career or because you are beautiful and talented. I am saying that because he lost a person who loved him like there is no tomorrow. And what did you lose? Someone who didn't love you. That in my eyes, is not losing but winning!"

This thing hit me real hard. 2017 was the year I promised myself to not give too much of love to people who don't deserve it. But I couldn't. I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it because I would keep going back to this person who would  talk to me just enough to not let me off the hook and keep me from moving on but had moved on in his life. And earlier I was too hard on myself for still  feeling those emotions of love for someone as toxic as this, for not being able to let go of the past. But then I embraced it. I embraced heartbreak. I cried. And then I saw how I wasn't being valued. And I left. I left that negative space. And it feels so much better. It's like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders! It's like you are living your life for YOU again. 

happiness

 

Initially, you won't be able to. Right now you probably feel like the world is over. You can't stop thinking about that person. But trust me, one day you will. Only if you try. And you must try. Because you deserve love. You deserve to be someone's first and only choice. You deserve to get pampered. You deserve everything because you are capable of loving someone unconditionally. BE PROUD OF YOURSELF.

Now, get back up and go out in the world. It's waiting for you to conquer it! 

 

Get over a breakup